Few days back, I was organising my wardrobe and I found an old diary of mine. And on one of the pages, I read this.
“Life sucks, everything sucks, no one cares, people are fake, they pretend, they lie, they hide. Its a mean, cruel world; they shout, they blame, they make you feel bad about yourself. I need help, I really do, there is no one to share the late night thoughts. I feel like a sucker, a loser, a failure at every damn thing. The thoughts are getting louder, yet somehow I am silent. Waiting for someone to come to the rescue, but everyone is just making it worse. Its getting scarier, but whom to tell, no one would understand, its me and only me in the end. Diary is just a temporary solution, its no use unless someone reads it. But still if someone does, I am afraid they won’t understand. Its a mean cruel world after all.”
Surprised? Me too. This is too much, that too, coming from a fifteen years old. I couldn’t believe i had written this. I do remember I was quite miserable back then but this much? This made me realize how much I have changed since then; how much I have grown. From ‘life sucks’ to life is beautiful’, from ‘I am a loser’ to ‘I can do it’, from calling people mean to considering them a blessing. And its not because I took therapy or something like that, its all because of the little things. Choosing motivational quotes instead of the sad ones, positive songs over the heartbreak ones, opening up to the right people, being less self conscious. It starts with just one step in the right direction. This also made me believe that if I am going through trouble right now, it will pass, I will get through, like I did before. And if I, a cry baby, can do it, why can’t you.
Believe me, It will pass, you will get through.
If you feel like talking about something but can’t find anyone, I will be glad to help you. You can dm me on my Instagram or email me or just drop a hey in the comments.